I've just learnt the offside rule! Thanks to this great explanation.

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have. The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire. Both of you have forgotten your purses. It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting. Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes. At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the shopper and, whilst the purse is in flight, you could nip around the other shopper catch the purse and buy the shoes.

Always remembering that until the purse had actually been thrown it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.

Steph Angel:

I do believe that if you are level with the first shopper when the purse is thrown then technically you are still onside, and thus the shoes should be yours.

All depends on the linesperson of course... Do they have linespersons in shoe shops??? 

Selina:

Ah, but you must also remember, that you could be in front of the other woman and returning from the till having asked if they sell scotchguard. If you attempt to catch the purse before returning to your place, then that is wrong. If you ignore the purse, allow it to land on the floor, return to second place in the queue and THEN push in front of the woman picking up the purse as you do so, then that's ok.

All of which means that Steph and I have thoroughly confused Jessica now. 

Lizz:

I rather agre with Selina, except...

This only applies if you are using the football definition of offsides. I tend to think in terms of ice hockey: It matters only where your feet are. that is to say that should you consider the static offside line to be roughly in parallel to the till, with the gal in front of you straddling the line, you'd only be offsides if you caught the purse the with both of your feet in front of your rival. If you straddled this imaginary line, that is to say you had one foot in front of her and one behind her, then caught the purse, you'd be onside.

Of course, you could always let the purse bounce off her, then check her with your shoulder, separating the purse from her, and buy the desired shoes. (My recommendation, as at this point you'd not only be onside, but have a clear shot at the shoes and register.)

Hmm... did I help or hurt the confusion issue?

Lizz 

Amy:

wow, you're good Jess xxx 

Joanna:

But you can be in front of the other shopper. As long as you aren't interfering with the shoes. 

Debbie Huggins:

Please keep the checks clean and your sticks on the ice. Make sure the purse has been thrown before stepping pass lady and receiving the purse to purchase shoes.